MURFREESBORO, TN – Murfreesboro Mayor Sugar Shane McHarland presented University of Tennessee Baseball Coach Tony Vitello a “Key to the City” this week, representing a commitment from the City of Murfreesboro to support college athletics programs as long as those programs are like 150 miles east of here. 

“The University of Tennessee has had a wildly successful run” said Mayor McHarland. “My hope is that some day we may have a Division-I athletics program here in Rutherford County.”

Here at the Murfreesboro Tribune, we hit the street to see how our citizens responded to the news, as we return to our #FromTheStreet coverage.

—

“I think it’s great! I mean sure, this place is like ten counties over, but it’s a state school! Our tax dollars support it! Well, not property tax or anything, but maybe sales tax on all that Vols shit at Walmart?”

– Brenda AllVol, Salt Life Ambassador

—

“This is so insulting. How can he overlook Motlow like that?”

– Mikayla Hatfield, MTSU Student

—

“I think it’s important to take this opportunity to share what we have going on at Middle—“

– Chris Bajardo, MTSU Athletics Director 

EDITOR’S NOTE: The quote from Director Bajardo is incomplete. Honestly the author of this article just tuned the f*** out mid-sentence. We still have no idea what is happening at that school.

—

Sam Clemens is the man smart enough to start a fake newspaper. He can be reached with comments, compliments, and salutations at [email protected]. If you have a complaint, please see our Contact Page.