The Weinermobile, a beloved automobile built in the shape of an Oscar Mayer Weiner, will make stops in Smyrna and Murfreesboro this week in an effort to promote the company’s recent efforts to make their hot dogs healthier.
Here at the Tribune, we are a very serious news organization. Just because this article uses the word weiner doesn’t mean we would make penis jokes. Those would just be too hard to keep up.
[ba dum tsssh]
Our man Eddie Poe took to the streets to find out your thoughts on the phantastical phallic phenom working its way through Middle Tennessee. Fair warning, if this thing remains in town more than four hours, consult a doctor.
From the Street: What do you think about the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile coming to Middle Tennessee?
“A phallic, gas-guzzling machine resembling a food made of pig anus is going to be in town next week? Who’s going to be in D.C. voting to repeal Obamacare, then?”
Sally Samuelson, Program Specialist
“I’ll pass. I used to be a Weinermobile groupie—no way they’re going to be able to match my crazy nights in the rent-by-the-hour hotels of Madison, Wisconsin.”
Ginger Nathans, Cashier
“I read about how Oscar Mayer made them free from artificial preservatives and by-products while avoiding added nitrites and nitrates, but I don’t know what any of that means.”
Bob Eufler, Insurance Salesman
Murfreesboro Tribune Beat Reporter Eddie Poe can be reached with comments, complaints, and sexual propositions at email@example.com.